Sonnettics

Oh, Angel Muse, I need, please give me voice
My words all swirl around my damaged brain
If I could die, it wouldn’t be my choice
I’d rather live with memories of pain
I’m more than what I am; I don’t know what
There’s beauty in my heart; I need to feel
I’ll live through every scene of life, uncut
Although at times I’ll wonder if it’s real
Each quatrain that I write is like my time
They come in waves of peace, iambically
I know there’s more to poetry than rhyme
There’s more to life than everything I see
Oh, Angel Muse, my thanks is in my breath
You gave me life when I was close to death.

I haven’t got a fucking thing to trade
I lost it all, and yet, I’m still alive
I’ll never dance, although the piper’s paid
My words will fill his music; I’ll contrive
To use the life I’ve got, like golden coins
Although my coins are counterfeit, like death
I love the way the piper’s song enjoins
The living souls to savor every breath
I’d trade my breath for what I had before
My gold was gold, unlike this fucking lead
It’s only lead.  So what if I’ve got more?
Just place it on my eyes when I am dead
I’ll sink into the river Styx from weight
Of counterfeited life, the life I hate.

Forever’s more than just a lot of time
In Love is more than just the way we feel
Like poetry is more than just a rhyme
All this, and more, my angel will reveal
Each time I feel her rhyme; I need to write
To try to find a metaphor as rich
As all the gold and diamonds; I invite
My mind to delve through every tiny niche
There’s more to us than you and me, alone
We’re not alone; forever makes us whole
Your voice is more than words upon my phone
I own your heart, your body, and your soul
What’s yours is mine; what’s mine is yours, as well
To be apart forever would be hell.

Obscurity is dull, like marking time
I don’t believe it’s lonely at the top
Obscurity surrounds me as I climb
I wish there was a cliff where I could drop
Obscurity, I wouldn’t even blink
I’d laugh to see it scattered far below
Obscurity’s aware of what I think
And doesn’t even seem to want to go
It smells just like I stepped in something bad
I guess I’ll stop and scrape it from my shoe
I know it thinks it took the chance I had
But chances come, no matter what I do
I’m built to climb to fame; I’m strong and fast
Obscurity may be, but it won’t last.

My life proceeds like something like a play
I guess I wrote it, but I act as well
I think I wrote the lines I need to say
I also wrote an act where I’m in hell
I guess I wrote the devil’s lines and scenes
I can’t believe I wrote him in at all
And no one understands just what it means
When from an angel’s arms I slip and fall
I want to shine in heaven, like a star
I want my leading lady at my side
But heaven is a distant hope, too far
To marry her, and hear, “now kiss the bride”
It’s like a play, and yet, my life is real
I write, I act, but most of all, I feel.

I am my scheme; it’s what I plan to be
My goals, my dreams, my wishes, all are mine
They’re mine, and more than that, they all are me
They’re not just words; they’re words that are divine
I do my best to follow where they lead
I’ll make the most important ones come first
They’re more than what I want; they’re what I need
They get me through the best of times and worst
I wish that I could make my dreams come true
I hope I set the goals I can achieve
I love it when I dream of me and you
You’ve shown me things in which I can believe
My life’s a map; I’ll use it for my scheme
And watch as it conforms with every dream.

My turn is when I change; it comes and goes
Like changing from my bike to run, or worse
From bike to nearly dead; nobody knows
The loss of that transition was a curse!
But now I’ve turned; I’m on a different road
My journey still proceeds from place to place
It didn’t stop my progress, merely slowed
My journey for a moment, but my pace
Is mine; I’ll pick it up and finish strong
My journey is my life; it’s full of turns
They bring me to the places I belong
My heart will find the place for which it yearns
My turn is more than just a simple change
I love the way it makes me rearrange.

I am my pulse; I feel my heart express
Emotions in a constant, rhythmic beat
The strongest, and the deepest one, I guess
Is love; it comes as warmth, or passion’s heat
It marks my life the way a clock marks time
My pulse is flesh and blood; it’s fast and strong
To find a matching pulse would be sublime
I need a rhythmic pulse to match my song
I feel my pulse when running in a race
It gets me to the finish line to win!
It brings the warmth of color to my face
When touched by love, I feel my pulse begin
Come, put your hand upon my chest and feel
My pulse; it lets me know my life is real.

I am my song; I’m beautiful to sing
Although, I know, sometimes my notes are flat
Like birds announcing morning, when they bring
The dawn; I hope my song will come like that
I want to be a lullaby to you
Come, fall asleep within my melody
My song is sung while you are dreaming too
I hope your dreams are musical, like me
I’m not a hymn, but angels like to hear
My song; I’ll try to make it worth their time
I love it when an angel draws me near
And tells me that she finds my song sublime
I want to be in harmony with life
And sing my song in joy and never strife.

I know she feels my pain; I love her choice
I know she feels my joy; I love her more
I hear the constant love within her voice
She knows she chooses words I won’t ignore
And yet, she doesn’t choose them just for me
She chooses them because she knows they’re true
Her voice displays her heart exquisitely
With colors that her loving words imbue
I’ve touched the silken fabric that she chose
I’ve never felt such softness bearing strength
Her fabric is the warmth of my repose
To feel it, I would go to any length
And yet, she gives her love to me, like this
She wraps my heart, then lingers for a kiss.